Coping Skills for Eating Disorder Urges

By Megan Samuels, MSW, LMSW, Outreach Coordinator

Those pesky eating disorder urges can often come at times when we are busy and need to focus on other tasks (for example being at school or at work).  It can be nice to have some coping skills in your back pocket for when these urges arise.  If you are able to, practice these coping skills before the urges come up and you are needing to use them.  This way, you are able to build adaptive neural networks in your brain for those coping skills.  Meaning, when you need them, they will be easier for your brain to retrieve (similar to the concept of “muscle-memory”).  

But first - what’s an eating disorder urge?
An urge is a strong desire to do something, so an eating disorder urge is a strong desire or impulse to engage in eating disorder behaviors (such as binge eating, restricting, purging, body checking, etc.)  An eating disorder urge is often associated with a feeling or a thought.  For example, someone might  have the thought, "I don’t like the way that I look.”  That thought may contribute to an urge to restrict food intake.  

Below is a description of four coping skills that can be helpful.  Not all skills for work everyone, so I invite you to try them out and see which one helps to decrease the intensity or the eating disorder urges.  Remember that it likely won’t work on the first try - these skills need to be repeated so our brain can access them more easily when we need them!

Coping Skill - Container

• Container is a skill where you can create a container (imaginary or in real life) that holds material for when you do not have the space to process it.  
• It is important to note with this skill that we are not dumping urges in a box and never coming back to them, more-so, holding these urges and icky feelings in a place that they can be until you have therapy or until you have time and safe-enough person to process through these urges.  

Coping Skill - Deep Breathing

• The key to deep breathing is breathing to activate your parasympathetic nervous system.  This is the nervous system state that is associated with rest and digestion.  The way you can activate this state is by breathing out for double the amount that you breathe in.  For example, if you breathe in for 2 breaths, then you need to breathe out for 4 breaths.  The longer exhale tells your brain and your body that you are safe enough to carry out “non-essential” functions, such as resting and digestion processes.  Doing this breathing cycle for a few minutes can help to regulate feelings and potentially the urges may feel a little less intense.  

Coping Skill - Distraction

• Sometimes brains need something else to focus on, instead of getting trapped in the thought cycles of eating disorder urges.  This is where distraction can come in.  The goal is to get your mind focused on something else.  This can be done in so many ways - like watching a funny video, looking at nature, watching television, or counting the objects that you see around you.  Another distraction skill can be reaching out to a friend or a loved one.  

Coping Skill - 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Grounding Exercise

• This grounding exercise helps to bring you back into the present moment using the 5 senses.  One thing I like about this exercise is that you can do it whenever and it can be discreet (for example if you are in a work meeting).  
  • The first thing that you do is notice 5 things that you can see.  Label them for yourself as you count the 5 things. 
    • Ex: “1 - I see a red chair.  2 - I see a blue bird…”
  • Notice 4 things that you can touch.  Label them for yourself as you count the 4 things. 
    • Ex: “1 - I feel a scratchy sweater...”
  • Think of 3 things that you can hear.  Label them for yourself as you count the 3 things. 
    • Ex: “1 - I hear my friend talking on the phone...”
  • See if you can smell anything.  Notice 2 things that you can smell.  Label them for yourself as you count the 2 things. 
    • Ex: “1 - I smell my lavender shampoo...”
  • Notice 1 thing that you can taste.  Label them for yourself as you count that thing.
    • Ex: “1 - I taste the gum in my mouth.”  If you cannot taste anything, think of one thing that you might want to taste (my go to is imagining tasting chocolate chip cookies).

If you have a therapist or coach on your team, I invite you to practice these coping skills with them in session so you have space to process these skills and tweak them (if needed) to better fit your recovery goals.

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The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We also provide eating disorder therapy in Arlington, Virginia and virtually throughout Virginia. Additionally, we offer eating disorder therapy virtually in New York (NYC), Florida, and California. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com