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By Jennifer Rollin, MSW, LCSW-C One of the challenges of recovery is the seemingly 'small' moments that happen every day. Whether it's struggling to follow your meal plan, facing challenging foods at a restaurant, or sitting with anxiety and thoughts about compensating after a meal-these moments can feel hard and exhausting. It can also be tough as people in your life might not always know how to help when your eating disorder thoughts are loud. I created this eight minute guided meditation (that also includes some recovery reminders) for moments when you are flooded with eating disorder thoughts. You can click the link below to listen! Struggling with constant thoughts about food and your body is exhausting. We can help. Book your free 15 minute consult. The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We also offer therapy for obsessive compulsive disorder. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com By Jennifer Rollin, MSW, LCSW-C  What if you viewed behaviors such as restricting, bingeing, purging, cutting, and/or using, as resilient attempts to try to regulate emotions, for some to cope with past trauma-as well as a way that you might be trying to communicate deeper messages. Of course, these behaviors may seem helpful in the short-term, but in the long term they do not actually solve the underlying problems, make you dependent on them, and often make you feel increasingly anxious and unhappy. However, when you shame yourself for struggling you typically only make things worse. What if instead, you practiced applying compassion and a mindful curiosity to the behaviors that you are struggling with? You are not ‘crazy,’ or broken, or screwed up, rather you are in pain and trying desperately to cope. ASPIRE I created the acronym ASPIRE as one skill that you can use when you have urges to engage in restricting, bingeing, purging, self-harming, and/or using. It’s important to practice using this skill when you are not feeling triggered, so that it is easier to access in those moments. Just like learning how to ride a bike or play an instrument, it will take practice in order for this skill to start to feel more natural and eventually even automatic. Also, it’s important to note that even if you engage in a behavior after-the ‘win’ can simply be creating space (i.e. pausing) and using this skill beforehand. Telling yourself that you are going to do this skill in place of the behavior will likely be a set-up. So, start by telling yourself that you will practice using this skill before using the behavior. 1. Alternate ways to communicate
2. Self-soothe
3. Practice self-compassion.
4. Invite curiosity.
5. Respond effectively.
6. Enlist support.
Prompt: 1. Make a list of the behaviors that you are currently struggling with and next to each one write the functions or ‘what it does for you.’ 2. Get curious about what the messages behind these behaviors might be-what do you think that you may be trying to communicate (to yourself and/or to others). Reflect on the details of your behaviors to see if you can find any meaning there (ie location that you are self-harming, foods you eating during a binge and ask yourself is physical or emotional restriction of those foods happening etc). 4. Next to each function, list at least one other more values-congruent way that you might be able to get that need met (if it’s not a self destructive desire). 5. Share this assignment with a therapist (if you are looking for support virtually or in Maryland fill out the contact form to schedule a free 20 min consult with a member of my team). You can get your life back and you don't have to continue to feel so trapped. Ultimately, you can find more life-affirming ways to get your needs met, gradually putting your eating disorder (or addiction, self harm, etc) out of a job. Struggling with constant thoughts about food and your body is exhausting. We can help. Book your free 15 minute consult. The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We also offer therapy for obsessive compulsive disorder. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com
By Jennifer Rollin, MSW, LCSW-C  Fear is my BFF. No really. This statement may feel confusing, but you totally can learn how to befriend fear. Many spend much of their lives trying to avoid fear and discomfort-which only causes to keep them ‘playing small’ and feeling trapped. So why do we feel afraid? If someone was truly fearless it would actually be dangerous. They might walk in the middle of traffic or stick their hand onto a hot stovetop. Fear shows up as an alarm signal-which actually is trying to protect us and it does protect us from certain things. The challenge is when the fear signal goes off for things that aren’t actually dangerous (helllllo anxiety disorders, eating disorders etc) i.e. public speaking, food, or a social gathering. Even if your mind is telling you that what you are afraid of could be potentially dangerous (for example: flying on a plane) typically the level of fear is out of proportion to the actual risk involved. When you struggle with an anxiety disorder or an eating disorder-your mind tends to catastrophize and go to the ‘worst case scenario.’ It does this in an effort to try to keep you stuck-but you don’t have to buy into it. How to Befriend Fear My life used to be really small. Growing up with generalized anxiety disorder (and eventually an eating disorder) there were periods where fear completely crippled me. When Fear Dominated My Life
I had to learn how to befriend fear-to recognize that my thoughts were just thoughts (not facts!) but the biggest lesson was learning how to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway.’ I used to think that I’d have to wait until I felt less afraid in order to do the hard and scary things-but that day never came. Instead, I learned how to gradually face the things that I was afraid of (starting with the lower level things on my anxiety hierarchy and then working my way up), with the support of a therapist and my entire life changed. Things I Initially Felt Fear About Which I Did Anyway **in chronological order but some of these are many years apart.
The thing is that the ‘doing it’ is what eventually took the fear away. The girl who was petrified of doing an internship interview or asking a teacher for a recommendation letter-went on to pitch Arianna Huffington, open her own individual and then group therapy practice, and did a bunch of public speaking and media interviews on TV. What could you do if you made friends with fear? The Bottom Line Instead of trying to push fear away-what if you mindfully welcomed it. What if instead of saying ‘I hate you’ and ‘I want to get rid of you’ you thanked your fear for trying to protect you-and decided to act in alignment with your true values anyway? I’m not saying that it’s easy (some days it might feel impossible)-but like an unruly house guest who keeps coming back no matter what you do, trying to push fear way will not work. Instead, invite fear in. Get to know it. Sit down with it. The aim is not to ‘be fearless’ it’s to gradually challenge yourself to do the things that you truly want to do-despite feeling afraid. Some of the things I was initially terrified of-I did shaking or crying (i.e. eating certain fear foods, driving by myself for the first time after a year etc)-but each time I grew strength and confidence that I didn’t have before. Now-I welcome fear as a signal that I’m growing. Your assignment: Think of a fear that you know you need to face. What would be one small step you can take today towards befriending that fear. Now, go do it! You’ve got this. The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We also offer eating disorder therapy virtually throughout California serving those in cities including Palo Alto, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Woodland Hills, San Jose, and Beverly Hills. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com
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The Eating Disorder CenterWe are a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center in Rockville, Maryland. Archives
March 2023
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