Black and White Thinking in Eating Disorder Recovery

By Courtney Levy Daniels, LMHC

Black and white thinking leads you to believe that something is either ALL good or ALL bad, ALL right or ALL wrong. Through the lens of an eating disorder, it can manifest like this: “I had a bite of cake, so my diet is ruined. I may as well eat the whole cake and be ‘good’ tomorrow.” Or how about, “I didn’t follow my meal plan completely, so I am a failure and I will never recover.” Sound familiar? 

The thing is, this type of thinking can be functional. I mean, why would we think this way if it wasn’t? It can give us a feeling of control by placing things neatly into categories, and serve as a way to help us make sense of the world.

However, the downside is that when we limit our thinking to dichotomies, it keeps us from seeing nuances. It keeps us from experiencing the full spectrum of what life has to offer.

For example, if we think of the weather as merely “hot” and “cold,” we’re not accounting for those perfect beach days - warm, sunny, and just the right amount of cloud cover to offer a few seconds of shade here and there.

And let’s not forget those crisp fall days - the ones where the air is cool enough for a cozy beanie and a pumpkin spice latte, but not chilly enough to warrant gloves. If you ask me, it’s those days in between “hot” and “cold” that are the best ones! So while it may make you feel safe to think in “all-or-nothing” terms, you’re also narrowing your view and limiting your experiences.

So how do we expand our black and white thinking to include color?

Some tips:

1. Increase awareness:

• Notice when you’re thinking in all-or-nothing terms or using dichotomous language (good/bad, right/wrong, smart/stupid, etc.) and label it!

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2. Actively challenge the thoughts:

• Try on a new thought that is more balanced and all-encompassing

Instead of: “I didn’t follow my meal plan completely, so I am a failure and I will never recover”

Try: “I didn’t make as many recovery-oriented choices as I would have liked to. Tomorrow is a new opportunity to make decisions that are in line with my values”

3. Practice self-compassion:

• Beating yourself up for struggling with black and white thinking is not helpful, instead practice self-compassion in these moments i.e. speaking to yourself how you would speak to someone that you love (or at a minimum starting with more neutral self-statements).
• Rather than judging yourself-practice applying a mindful curiosity to your thoughts.

Reminder: This is not EASY! It takes practice, practice, practice. But with time, it will come more naturally and help you live a much more vibrant life.
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Are you ready to find freedom?

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The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We also offer eating disorder therapy virtually throughout California and New York (NYC) serving those in cities including Palo Alto, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Woodland Hills, San Jose, and Beverly Hills. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com ​