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By Megan Samuels, MSW, LMSW, Outreach Coordinator  *Content Warning: This blog post discusses grief and loss. If this is something that you are struggling with or have struggled with, we invite you to take care of yourself in whatever that looks like for you. What is Disenfranchised Grief? Kenneth Doka coined the term, “disenfranchised grief,” meaning grief that is not “openly acknowledged, socially validated, or publicly mourned” (Doka, 2002). Some examples of disenfranchised grief include pet loss, miscarriage, or loss of a person who is not familial/blood-related. I think that our society has come a long way with expanding compassion and tenderness to people experiencing grief and I think there is room for growth, particularly with things that people may not consider as “traditional grief.” Research suggests that post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can develop in around one in three women following pregnancy loss (National Institute for Health and Care Research, 2021). Another study discussed that people with repeated pregnancy loss are likely to experience an increased risk of anxiety, depression, grief, guilt, and anger (Sugiura-Ogasawara et al., 2002). When these emotions are not well accepted within the constructs of society, mental health symptoms can increase or intensify following experiences of loss. Unfortunately when it comes to individuals experiencing grief they may receive invalidating comments from other people. An example of an invalidating comment that someone might say to someone experiencing pregnancy loss is “at least you know you can get pregnant!” or “you can always just try again!” It’s so important to those supporting others experiencing grief to try to educate themselves. Being the recipient of invalidating comments when you are going through grief can be hurtful and may cause individuals to feel more isolated. Being able to practice self-compassion through our experiences of grief can be helpful. And experiencing compassion and support from loved ones and professionals while grieving is also important. It’s also crucial to note that all forms of grief and loss are valid and can be highly impactful. Another thing that I find helpful is to expand our definition of grief/loss. I like to look at it as any change where you don’t have someone/something anymore and that is bringing up feelings. When we look at this expanded version of grief, we can consider a college student moving out of a dorm after graduation. Although the next step of moving into an apartment and looking for a job can be exciting, there is also an element of grief/loss of leaving behind college, the structure of an institution, and relationships and sense of community. This may not be seen as typical “grief,” however, someone may experience feelings of sadness, anger, anxiety and depression, just as one may after the loss of a loved one. How Does This Relate to Eating Disorder Recovery? If you are in recovery from an eating disorder, disenfranchised grief can be a trigger to an eating disorder relapse. You may find that eating disorder symptoms, anxiety symptoms, and other mental health symptoms increase during periods of grief. This may mean needing to re-engage in therapy or recovery coaching to learn ways to manage symptoms of grief and eating disorder behaviors. Additionally, if you have recently experienced grief, you may be at risk for disordered eating and/or eating disorder development. Grief is something that is not always controllable and some people cope with trying to control their food intake and/or what their body looks like. When we treat eating disorder behavior and symptoms, we also want to be mindful about treating any underlying conditions, which could be related to grief and/or loss. Conclusion & Resources: Mental health symptoms of disenfranchised grief can be worked through and processed in therapy. The first step is identifying that it is something that you are experiencing. As discussed in this blog post, perinatal loss and pet loss are two forms of disenfranchised grief. If you or a loved one are experiencing one of these forms of loss and are looking for support, we have provided some links below to explore. Additionally, our clinicians have experience working with grief and loss and we would be honored to support you in your healing journey. Pet Loss Resources: Perinatal Loss Resources:
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Schedule a free 15 min consult for eating disorder therapy in MD, VA, DC, NY, FL, or recovery coaching worldwide. Click here. The Eating Disorder Center is a premier outpatient eating disorder therapy center founded by Jennifer Rollin. We specialize in helping teens and adults struggling with anorexia, binge eating disorder, bulimia, OSFED, and body image issues. We provide eating disorder therapy in Rockville, MD, easily accessible to individuals in Potomac, North Potomac, Bethesda, Olney, Silver Spring, Germantown, and Washington D.C. We also provide eating disorder therapy in Arlington, Virginia and virtually throughout Virginia. Additionally, we offer eating disorder therapy virtually in New York (NYC), Florida, and California. We provide eating disorder recovery coaching via Zoom to people worldwide. Connect with us through our website at www.theeatingdisordercenter.com
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